On Thursday, though the sun was out it was biting cold. There was a desolate feeling in the camp this week as we worked in the chilled and draughty containers of the CAMIE.
Whether one found oneself in the cold of the shadow or the tempered warmth of the sun seemed to mirror the sense of fatefulness in the camp. It feels up to the luck of the draw whether people have family connections in the UK that can support claims to asylum and safe passage, or face what lies ahead once the camp is dismantled and residents are asked to board buses to currently unknown destinations.
One young man with a quiet demeanour did an abstract painting that was reminiscent of Rothko, the muted tones echoing the sombre atmosphere of the day. The divided forms seemed to reflect the spaces we were working in and the sense of floating in limbo.
A young man, who was brought to the group by the psychologist, carefully traced the figure of an ice skater, tracing and retracing the image in an attempt to find solidity and form. His final image of the day depicted a vibrant pomegranate tree, where fruitfulness, health and abundance can still be found amidst the heavy atmosphere of the camp.
There is a sense that people are finding it harder to motivate themselves and struggling to find the necessary energy to cope with this situation. The overwhelming effort needed to try and make plans for the future is hard to find.
On Friday we worked in the Médecins du Monde space and were joined by several of their team from Dunkirk. They were keen to experience the way Art Refuge UK supports the psychosocial space in our work, and share some thinking about how we use different materials.
The medium of choice today was pencil, its precision, dryness and control brining some containment, much needed in a time of such precariousness and uncertainty. Several young men who we have worked with for some time, returned to share further details and memories of situations in their home countries and journeys. Many of these painful and traumatic experiences that take much courage to retell and depict. As time runs out in the camp there is a sense of urgency to express and communicate to us these deeply personal stories.
A group of Sudanese men created with speed plasticine animals, leaving them in our care before saying goodbye and going outside to play the drums. Another young man was able to bring some playfulness to his creations by making a paper buffalo, laughter entering into a space where anxiety and fear for the future was apparent.
As one man drew a lorry on the road to Dover and his quest to get to the UK, simultaneously an image was created by another man depicting a road that appeared to go nowhere. Both pictures showing the impossibility felt at the current situation and the sense of blocked paths. Painful discussions were held throughout the day around what is now possible.
One man described how hard it is to change plans, to look for other future paths when you have been trying so long to reach what you believe will be the end of your journey. “Where is home? What is home? If you keep trying and can’t find your way out, how do you find a new path?”